Australian Survivor Report Card - Brains v Brawn 2 - Episode 15
Featuring Myles' morning after, janitors, not drowning, laughing and arse-toes
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Previously on Australian Survivor: Paulie needed a hug, Kaelan held a spool and Myles did a mischief
Myles’ Morning After
Grade: A
Myles returns from Tribal Council, giddy about his Steal-An-Idol, Blindside-A-PD play. He spends pretty much the entire episode on a high, giggling to himself (and AJ) and ignoring anybody who tries to harsh his vibe.
Logan leads the vibe-harshing charge. “Just explain to me why you’d be so tricksy and horrid!” she hisses.
Myles shrugs. “Dunno.” And then he has another cackle fit, before revealing that he’s bored with not just the song ‘Kumbaya’ (dull melody, insipid chord structure) but also its lazy adoption as shorthand for non-confrontational (‘it’s a noun, you fools, not an adjective!’ he sniggers).
“I’ll be your loyal soldier forever!” says a grateful Paulie, meanwhile.
“Awesome!” says Myles, then immediately reveals in confessional that he’ll cut Paulie whenever he pleases, because that’d be kinda funny, too? Also, maybe he’ll snipe, I dunno, Laura? And who cares if he doesn’t win half a million dollars because it’s worth it to be this entertaining. And then he bursts into laughter again.
Then he wanders off half-naked with Kaelan and AJ to reform the Graduates. Remember the Graduates? Of course you do.
Anyway. Quite the morning.
Janitors
Grade: B-
Time for a reward challenge, a classic game of Twinned Water Netball, in which players are roped together in pairs to gather balls and throw them in hoops.
Needless to say, AJ takes this as an opportunity to hit on Kate some more, to whom he is luckily bound. “Your running is so impressive!” he says at one point. “Your hair hasn’t even got wet!” he says at another. Then concludes with “Maybe you and I should just get married as a joke?”
Regardless of AJ’s shameless flirting, the sextet (don’t say it!) of which they’re a part, win reward, thanks mostly to Paulie’s accurate basket-sinking, but partially to Myles being a little stinker and tossing the opposition’s ball as far away as possible while he continues to chortle like a maniac.
At the reward, Kristin makes it clear that she’s still targeting AJ, because of what Myles did the night before.
“Wait, what?” says AJ.
Myles continues to laugh and laugh and laugh, explaining in guffawing confessional that AJ mostly exists in the game now to clean up his (Myles’) messes.
“The AJ stands for ‘altruistic janitor’,” he explains, snickering his head off.
Not Drowning, Laughing
Grade: B+
Much to Logan’s annoyance, Myles is still laughing by the time they head off to the immunity challenge, a classic game of Drown’Em’Ups!
He feels even sillier now - you know how it is when you’re in one of those good mood days - and so starts singing during the challenge. He also does some commentary, and at one point, some pretty slick observational humour. (‘Did you ever notice AJ’s hat? What’s up with that?’)
JLP is trying to give the challenge some urgency and drama. “Do you fight through that panic or do you run away from it?” he intones, but Myles is in no mood for seriousness.
“Don’t you mean ‘swim away from it’?” he snickers. And he starts laughing again. Sure, he swallows a lot of sea water in the process, but do you think that’s going to stop him from talking and laughing and generally having the best day of his life?
Of course not.
Eventually, he loses the challenge, of course. Because, y’know, Kaelan. But he had a great day out. And that’s the most important thing.
Arse-Toes
Grade: D
Laura and Logan decide it’s time to split the votes between AJ and Myles, because they can’t abide anybody having that good of a day.
Unfortunately for them, AJ and Myles have decided to split the votes between Laura and Logan. How far can the votes be split? This is precisely the kind of philosophical riddle that so enthralled the Ancient Greeks. Also, Karin, who’s in the middle, and therefore gets to choose who goes home.
Her decision is made when Laura suddenly declares in the middle of Tribal Council that ‘the toes that you step on today could be attached to the arses you have to kiss tomorrow’.
Toes attached to arses?? Gross.
So Karin convinces Logan to play her idol, and Laura goes home instead, a situation that annoys her (Laura (and, I guess, Logan too)) greatly.
Myles? Not so much.
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