Australian Survivor Report Card - Brains v Brawn 2 - Episode 11
Featuring imaginary friends, coven sequels, troughs and manifesting advantages
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Previously on Australian Survivor: Challenges were thrown, balls were thrown and Kaelan bit Noonan
Imaginary Friends
Grade: B+
In the aftermath of the previous night’s Tribal Council and the revelation that AJ had an idol he hadn’t told anybody else about, Karin is just about completely fed up with him. (But, based on previous experience so far this season, not quite yet just about completely fed up enough with him to actually vote him out.)
“I thought we were in an alliance,” says Karin.
“And I thought we were in an alliance,” replies AJ. He then waxes philosophical. “Hence, by the principles of Descartes, cogito ergo sum: We think (we’re in an alliance), therefore we are (in an alliance).” And he adopts the thinker pose to accentuate the point.
“Wait,” says Kaelan, popping into the conversation. “You have wax?”
AJ takes Kaelan off to show him the wax, and tells him (Kaelan) that he (AJ) wouldn’t have survived this game if it weren’t for him (Kaelan).
Kaelan doesn’t utter a word in response, raising the distinct possibility that he is merely AJ’s imaginary friend, CGI’ed onto the show in preparation for a stunning late game plot twist.
Coven Sequels
Grade: B-
Over on the New Brains tribe, meanwhile, fresh alliances are being made. Jesse (or possibly Ben) suggests that they form a mega-alliance consisting of everybody in this new tribe!
“A MAGA alliance?” questions Myles, raising a wary eyebrow.
“Mega-alliance. Mega-alliance,” whisper the producers hurriedly. Let’s not get into any political shit.
Morgan finally speaks, and her verdict is simple: MAGA alliances suck! And, after a hasty clarification from the producers once more, she also confirms that mega-alliances suck!
Instead, she and Kate agree to join Zara and Laura on an all-girl coven sequel tribe, with which they’ll secretly run the tribe! Coven 2: The Recovening!
Once again in this season, another great and exciting power alliance with only the very minor flaw that it isn’t, alas, technically speaking, a majority of the tribe.
Troughs
Grade: C
But now it’s time for an immunity challenge, a classic game of Multi-Player Pole Tro—
No, sorry about that. The challenge is done, New Brains losing before JLP can even finish explaining how it works. Jesse (or possibly Ben) explains how he thinks their trough was positioned above a gravitational well. Ben (or possibly Jesse) theorises that maybe time moves differently on their part of the island and that perhaps they’d been holding the trough up for hours? And PD blames Candy.
“Candy from episode one?” clarifies JLP, still fuming because he didn’t get to make any of his usual pole entendres, or even the trough puns he’d been working on (eg, ‘Brawn off to a trough start’)
“Yes,” says PD.
On the plus side, at least there was no actual throwing in that thrown challenge because that was doing my head in.
Manifesting Advantages
Grade: B+
When Ben and Jesse notice The Recovening making their schemes, they muse upon their options.
Ben (or possibly Jesse): Should we bring that disgusting jungle rat, Myles, into our alliance?
Jesse (or possibly Ben): Ugh, he’s the absolute worst, but I guess we have no choice.
And the camera pulls back to reveal that Myles has been sitting less than a metre away from them the entire time. They absorb him into their alliance. Or, at least they think they do. Myles grows a little hesitant when he realises neither of them can count to four, but he plays along, naming the alliance after one of Ben’s tattoos.
But just as it looks like the Winona Forevers and The Recovening will go head to head, Laura manifests herself an advantage. Or, in this case, JLP’s lost ‘tonight’s Tribal Council will be a little bit different’ notes.
Turns out JLP’s notes (as always, written in scroll form) say that whoever gets voted out tonight will simply move over to the other tribe. Zara and Laura squabble over who should be allowed to leave, with Laura’s crude magic proving no match for Zara’s PTA skills.
The vote ends in bitterness and recrimination, with The Recovening torn apart. Maybe ‘Coven 3: Gimme Some Coven’ will work out better?
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